Do you know how to get into Heaven?
As I was leaving starbucks this mid-morning, a teenage gal approached me and said:
“excuse, me…this may seem strange but I really feel like I am supposed to give you this”.
Then she handed me this:
“What is it?” I asked her.
“It’s a checklist of what people think you need to do to get into heaven and stuff”-she replied.
“Oh, well thank you.” I said as I took the pamphlet. (end scene)
WHAT THE F**K!
Before I get into the content of the pamphlet, let me go into why I think she thought she was “supposed to” give me the heaven pamphlet.
I think she thought I was a heathen…or a witch….or both.
It’s probably because I am wearing a mid-calf length black flowy skirt with gold sequence accents here and there accompanied by a black tank top, a cool gold necklace, and super star shades (that Dale thinks make me look like a bug). I also had on a gigantic ring (other than my wedding ring..haha). Oh, and my hair was worn long and curly...as usual.
The proper attire for a good Christian girl, in a teen’s view, is a pair of shorts, running shoes with socks, and a Christian t-shirt that tells everyone you love Jesus.
A nice cross necklace is also in order, but stay away from the crucifix necklace because that signifies you are Catholic and Catholics worship Mary and graven images.
Also, Catholics are not Christian. (not really, Catholics are Christians and we don’t worship Mary or graven images…fool!)
When I got home, I decided to read the little pamphlet.
On the inside front cover, it asks:
AM I GOING TO HEAVEN?
INSTRUCTIONS: check below what you think is necessary to get to Heaven.
(In parenthesis, I have added some of my comments)
1. Obey God’s law and commandments. (ten commandments rule, fool: "And behold, one came up to him, saying, "Teacher, what good deed must I do, to have eternal life?And he said to him, "Why do you ask me about what is good? One there is who is good. If you would enter life, keep the commandments." Matthew 19:16-17 )
2.Be sorry for your sins, and confess your sins. (hmm, Catholics confess their sins)
3.Sincerely do your best.
4.Turn from your sins and stop sinning.
5.Do good deeds.
6.Give money to church or charity. (Catholics tithe..but so do many other religions: "Jesus said to him, "If you would be perfect, go, sell what you
possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven;
and come, follow me." Matthew 19:21)
7.Water baptism or Holy communion. (Catholics go through water baptism and holy communion as part of the holy sacraments)
8.Trust in Jesus Christ alone as your personal Savior.
9.Trust in Jesus Christ as your Savior, and also serve him.
10.There is no Heaven or Hell.
Some of these, I feel, are direct digs at the Catholic faith.
Whatevs. I can deal with it.
The pamphlet says that out of the 10 things listed, only one will get you to heaven.
Which one is it?
#8
“We are all sinners; we all deserve to go to Hell; Heaven is a perfect place; nothing we do can make us perfect. How then can we go to Heaven?”- From the pamphlet
So forget about the rest of the stuff, ya’ll. It just does not matter.
You don’t have to serve Jesus, just believe in him. Ok. Sounds pretty easy to me.
I AM GOING TO HEAVEN!!!
Hallelujia!
I guess Muslims, Buddhists, and Jewish folk are all going to Hell. Sorry guys. You suck.
‘Love for others and respect for their rights and dignity, no matter who or what they are: ultimately these are all we need. So long as we practise these in our daily lives, then no matter if we are learned or unlearned, whether we believe in Buddha or God, or follow some other religion or none at all, as long as we have compassion for others and conduct ourselves with restraint out of a sense of responsibility, there is no doubt we will be happy’ - Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama.
Even as the fingers of the two hands are equal, so are human beings equal to one another. No one has any right, nor any preference to claim over another. You are brothers. (Final Sermon of Muhammad)
"Love your fellow as yourself” – Taken from the Torah
Jesus Christ said, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another" (John 13:34).
“excuse, me…this may seem strange but I really feel like I am supposed to give you this”.
Then she handed me this:
“What is it?” I asked her.
“It’s a checklist of what people think you need to do to get into heaven and stuff”-she replied.
“Oh, well thank you.” I said as I took the pamphlet. (end scene)
WHAT THE F**K!
Before I get into the content of the pamphlet, let me go into why I think she thought she was “supposed to” give me the heaven pamphlet.
I think she thought I was a heathen…or a witch….or both.
It’s probably because I am wearing a mid-calf length black flowy skirt with gold sequence accents here and there accompanied by a black tank top, a cool gold necklace, and super star shades (that Dale thinks make me look like a bug). I also had on a gigantic ring (other than my wedding ring..haha). Oh, and my hair was worn long and curly...as usual.
The proper attire for a good Christian girl, in a teen’s view, is a pair of shorts, running shoes with socks, and a Christian t-shirt that tells everyone you love Jesus.
A nice cross necklace is also in order, but stay away from the crucifix necklace because that signifies you are Catholic and Catholics worship Mary and graven images.
Also, Catholics are not Christian. (not really, Catholics are Christians and we don’t worship Mary or graven images…fool!)
When I got home, I decided to read the little pamphlet.
On the inside front cover, it asks:
AM I GOING TO HEAVEN?
INSTRUCTIONS: check below what you think is necessary to get to Heaven.
(In parenthesis, I have added some of my comments)
1. Obey God’s law and commandments. (ten commandments rule, fool: "And behold, one came up to him, saying, "Teacher, what good deed must I do, to have eternal life?And he said to him, "Why do you ask me about what is good? One there is who is good. If you would enter life, keep the commandments." Matthew 19:16-17 )
2.Be sorry for your sins, and confess your sins. (hmm, Catholics confess their sins)
3.Sincerely do your best.
4.Turn from your sins and stop sinning.
5.Do good deeds.
6.Give money to church or charity. (Catholics tithe..but so do many other religions: "Jesus said to him, "If you would be perfect, go, sell what you
possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven;
and come, follow me." Matthew 19:21)
7.Water baptism or Holy communion. (Catholics go through water baptism and holy communion as part of the holy sacraments)
8.Trust in Jesus Christ alone as your personal Savior.
9.Trust in Jesus Christ as your Savior, and also serve him.
10.There is no Heaven or Hell.
Some of these, I feel, are direct digs at the Catholic faith.
Whatevs. I can deal with it.
The pamphlet says that out of the 10 things listed, only one will get you to heaven.
Which one is it?
#8
“We are all sinners; we all deserve to go to Hell; Heaven is a perfect place; nothing we do can make us perfect. How then can we go to Heaven?”- From the pamphlet
So forget about the rest of the stuff, ya’ll. It just does not matter.
You don’t have to serve Jesus, just believe in him. Ok. Sounds pretty easy to me.
I AM GOING TO HEAVEN!!!
Hallelujia!
I guess Muslims, Buddhists, and Jewish folk are all going to Hell. Sorry guys. You suck.
‘Love for others and respect for their rights and dignity, no matter who or what they are: ultimately these are all we need. So long as we practise these in our daily lives, then no matter if we are learned or unlearned, whether we believe in Buddha or God, or follow some other religion or none at all, as long as we have compassion for others and conduct ourselves with restraint out of a sense of responsibility, there is no doubt we will be happy’ - Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama.
Even as the fingers of the two hands are equal, so are human beings equal to one another. No one has any right, nor any preference to claim over another. You are brothers. (Final Sermon of Muhammad)
"Love your fellow as yourself” – Taken from the Torah
Jesus Christ said, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another" (John 13:34).
posted by sarahsmile3 at
12:42 PM
4 Comments:
Amen Sister!
Now only if someone would hand you a Jack Chick pamphlet so you could blog about it...
OMG, Tracy... My brother just told me about this Jack Chick fella on the phone. I looked up his stuff....dude should be ashamed.
I'm an insomniatic 'hit and run blog peruser' who uses keywords for doing apologetics. I came across your blog tonight using the keywords "Catholics are not christian".
Thank you for the laugh! Great blogging! Thanks for taking time away from "worshipping Mary" to write it, lol.
Seriously though, if you haven't already started, you might want to check into studying 'apologetics' yourself,(Patrick Madrid, Scott Hahn, Marcus Grodi)as you will find in time that there are a good many "Jack Chick"s in the world unfortunately. However most are very well meaning, but are greatly mislead by chick and people like him. Many have based their Catholic 'facts' on the writing of Loraine Boettner who published a book of unsubstantiated lies.
And finally, since you are obviously a woman of intelligence, like myself, may I introduce you to JPII's "Theology of the Body" (that is if you are not already familiar with it)? Christopher West has written some good introductory articles that you can find easily on the internet. I found it interesting and recommend it to all. Any Google search will send you to a good site.
Well I've done my "hit" to your site, I need to "run" off again and find some other poor blogger's site to make an unexpected visit to.
God Bless you in your walk with Him!
Paula, the "Hit & Run Blog Peruser"
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