Monday, August 27, 2012

Expensive Jewelry

I was sitting in the nail salon, waiting for the paint on my pre-fall manicure/pedicure to dry when this woman walks up to me and says, "I have those earrings in turquoise."

I have seen this woman before. She is the woman that carries a Louis Vuitton bag and makes sure you know that she does. She will also tell you about how she just bought her daughter a Chanel purse.
Even though she wears the same busted, black stretch pants every time I see her. 

So she makes the comment about the earrings and I say something like, "oh." She comes back with, "Those are Kendra Scott, right?"
I said, "yes" and she looks down at me (literally, I was seated and she was standing) and says, "Well you can never be sure." as if I were wearing some knock offs or something.


Now, I only have the earrings because I got them for half off. Full price Kendra Scott is a bit too rich for my blood. 

Right after this lady delivers her last line, the woman next to me says, "well I am wearing some VERY expensive jewelry."

I was like, "holy Moses smell the roses, what is this bitch talking about?" But then, the best thing happened. She explained that her husband had broken his clavicle a while back. They had to screw a titanium piece to the bone to piece it together and allow it to heal. He was playing polo and was thrown from his horse. To add injury to insult, the horse stomped on his collar bone and crushed that sucker. A few years after the surgery, the titanium piece started to poke at the skin which led to another surgery for it's removal. The doctors asked the man if he wanted to keep the parts and he said, "hells yes." Well his wife thought the piece was shiny and pretty, so they had it made into a necklace. Here:

With matching earrings made from two of the screws that attached the piece to the bone:

With the total cost of both surgeries, the woman said her jewelry was worth about $400, 000. She enjoyed wearing her husband's titanium clavicle as it was "close to his heart" for quite some time.

I really enjoyed her conversation and company. Louis Vuitton lady? Not so much.

Thursday, August 09, 2012

The Shirt

Dale and I were on our way down town for a work event (his) when I looked over at him and noticed the shirt he was wearing. It was a white, short sleeved, single pocket number with thin blue and yellow intersecting lines. Here, see for yourself:

Those blue and yellow lines did not agree with me. I think it was the shade of yellow, but I can not be certain.

"Did I buy you that shirt?" I asked this question because I do most of Dale's shopping. I enjoy doing so and he enjoys having a personal shopper (his words, not mine). Anyway, I could not remember buying that shirt. If I had, I must have seen it on the clearance rack for $1.50 during a post lunch shopping trip. That lunch had to have included two glasses of wine. This would be the only way I would buy that shirt. 

"No, I bought it" Dale replied.

"Oh." I said, with a lift of my eyebrow. 

"Sorry you don't like it" said Dale with a touch of sarcasm.

I patted Dale's leg, smiled and said "I'm just relieved I did not buy it."

Later that evening, I found the shirt in the laundry and hid it in another room. The next day, I thought about ways I could destroy it. Here you go:
Even Harry Nilsson looks at the shirt with an expression that says "you would be better dressed in my bathrobe."


Then, my camera's battery died. 

So far, the shirt lives. I guess I could just donate it to goodwill or something. 

No fun in that. 

Sunday, August 05, 2012

Cut and Style

This new haircut is tripping me out, but in a good way. Within the past few weeks I have blown it out, used a flat iron on it, used hot rollers, let it air dry, used a diffuser, and have tried 3 different types of product. Yes I do have a lot of time on my hands. Why do you ask?

Yesterday, I gave myself bangs:


Not too bad, but not exactly what I was expecting. I did not cut bangs, oh no. I Just pinned my hair back to create the illusion of bangs.

I had to get it out of my system as I have been wondering what it would be like to have bangs for a very long time.

Now I know.

Carry on.